Good Manners Start at Birth....Children should write thank you notes from birth (or have them written for them unless they are a child prodigy and can write out of the womb). Mom or Dad or even a nanny can do it.  "Dear Michelle, Georgie loves his porcelain cup. He most enjoys putting milk in it and then pouring it on the floor. It was very nice of you to think of him." And that's all you have to say, you've done it. You've written for him.

Then, when the child is four, you guide his hand over the notepaper. The child knows he has written a note. When he's 7 or 8, you write it down and then he painfully prints copies it onto a card, it doesn't matter if it looks perfect.

When he's 9 he should write the note and you will have to nag him. You have to sit down with him, hand him the stamps and address the envelopes for him. But make him write the notes out and promise him all kinds of rewards - we'll go to the football game when you finish.

By the time they are 12 you should not have to say, have you written that thank you note Aunt Louise? (You probably will have to, but you shouldn't have to!) By the time the child is 14, definitely he or she should be in a regimen where it's an automatic response the day after and mom should keep giving him boxes of stationery and note cards as a reminder that sits there on his bureau.

Give your children a set of cute personalised stationery and say "I'm expecting you to use this for your thank notes".